"THE BAD" ELF ON A SHELF (not for children)

"THE BAD" ELF ON A SHELF

(not for children)

Every family has that one "black sheep" in the family. Well, my family happened get the black sheep elf. He's not teaching as much as he's getting caught in the act. I'd like to think of these photos as more.... Don't let this happen to your elf. This elf is family and we love our family. He's just my "special child". I hope this helps explains things a little bit better.

(NOT FOR CHILDREN - CONTAINS VIOLENT AND DISTURBING BEHAVIOR)

elf Christmas funny doll Shelf graphic design art director photo creative bad

This elf on a shelf business is getting a little out of hand!
...is that cocaine?

I TAKE BACK ALL THE BAD THINGS I SAID ABOUT "THE ELF ON THE SHELF"!

Tippin' the sauce.

Dexter isn't the only one with a dark passenger.

The only code this elf follows is "Eliminate The Competition"

HE ROBBED A GAS STATION!!!

Why did you have to ask for an I.D.?

On the positive side, at least he used the toilet.

Well, I think the elf is finally behaving.
After his bath, he must be watching a movie 'cause he said

he was going to "scrub these workin' girls clean and RELEASE THE KRAKEN".

I told that elf that they were kidding when they said

there pimp was Santa but he didn't want to take any chances.

He told me later waterboarding is a big hit with the hipsters.

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
STAY AWAY FROM THE LIGHT!

He says he only smokes menthol so noone will bum from him.

Okay, how did he get ether!

Well I guess you can check "Grand Theft Auto" from the bucket list.

Welcome to FIGHT CLUB.

If this is your first time, you have to fight........THE ELF!!!

Ken is tapping out and the elf is looking to see if anyone wants him to finish him off.

I'd like to say it was beginners luck, but it's not his first time.

Purse snatching!?! Now you're just showing off!

What you don't see is the elderly in the isle yelling "I've fallen and I can't get up!"

I told him car surfing went out in the 90's but he doesn't listen.
I think it was planned, afterwards he said he makes more with pain meds

than he does with his magic dust.

I guess vandalism and profanity go hand in hand.

He said he thought he'd get a gig with the tooth fairy after Christmas but I'm pretty sure she doesn't use pliers!

Elf prepares to take another tooth!

Huffing paint is bad enough but he didn't even pay for the cans!

Well look here!

The elf is taking a day off from violence. Could this be the end of his crime spree?

Hum. Smurfs do taste like tomatoes! Who would've thought.

Looks like Smurfs are on the menu tonight.

He refers to the block of ice as "old school".

HE'S GONNA TORCH THE TREE!
PUT THE LIGHTER DOWN!

He misunderstood me when I said, "reuse, reduce, recycle".

P.S. Santa is okay, I got there just in time.

Looks like the elf is tying up some loose ends!

Great, he found the cam.......................

Let me tell ya, he put up one hell of a fight!

Hey, look who got out of prison. I don't think it was nessisary to break in. Is he flipping me off!?!?

Looks like our little elf has made a friend with the not so popular smurf "Cannibal Smurf".

....just like that he was gone. And I was left there, trying to explain to 2 policemen why a 37 year old man was playing with a doll in the middle of the street.